North Korea, Best Korea!
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
