so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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