we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
Randomize
