I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
