i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize