Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
