We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
