i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
