but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Randomize
