Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
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