we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize