i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize
