The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Randomize
