I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
I DEMAND FORESKIN
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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