were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
he had hair everywhere except his balls
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
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