he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Randomize
