i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
