Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Randomize