I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
