Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
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