idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize