he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Randomize