I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize
