do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize