My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
