Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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