Dual....:-)
hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
You're a waste of cheezeits
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Randomize
