Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
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