How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
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