quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
