she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Randomize
