she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize
