OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
