K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Randomize
