bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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