Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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