I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
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