yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
