I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
