You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
