It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
I just gift wrapped bread.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
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