I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Actions speak louder than pants.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
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