why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
Randomize
