I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
