i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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