C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
