Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
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