think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize