Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
My feet surprised me
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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