At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize