I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Randomize
